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The Chief's Demise

 
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hboff
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Joined: 25 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 30, 2004 2:57 am    Post subject: The Chief's Demise Reply with quote

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The Chief's Demise
Posted by (ENS) Rabid_Gallagher (rabid_masterchief@hotmail.com)
26 November 2004, 12:00 AM

http://halosn.bungie.org/fanfic/?story=ens_rabid_ga.1126040000561.html
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Fraggio
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Joined: 15 Oct 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 30, 2004 11:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Didn't flow smoothly enough in my opinion. It kinda sputtered.
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SYSTEM
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Joined: 30 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 30, 2004 9:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

ENS, I'd like you to read "A Poet's Advice to Students" by E.E Cummings before you go any further. But don't just skim over the four paragraphs - I want you to understand the philosophy behind this - a poem is not words hurriedly slapped together, Cummings implies.

Try again after reading it, and remember, feel - don't rhyme.

Good Luck, pal

- Dave.
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Fleet Admiral
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Joined: 19 Aug 2004
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 01, 2004 4:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hey, it's Fleet Admiral. Well, I'm not much for these poams, but I liked this one. Not all poams have to rime and flow the same way. Still, I thought it was interesting.
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MC's Cousin
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 1:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It went by too fast, and got really repedetive. It didn't flow that well either.
You just need to perfect your poem skills. Sit down and practice for a while. Then, when you get a good inspiration, write it down, no matter where you are. It might turn out to be a great poem.
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Chuckles
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Joined: 29 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 7:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It sounded more like prose than poetry. Rhyming isn't necessary, but flow and tempo are. Be less repetitive, and aim for something deeper than mere description. THAT would be more poetic. But it takes guts to post a Halo poem, and I respect that. It certainly isn't easy to write moving verse about a video game Very Happy

C.T. Clown
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