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The Little Library of Horrors

 
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hboff
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 14, 2004 9:23 pm    Post subject: The Little Library of Horrors Reply with quote

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The Little Library of Horrors
Posted by John Gurule, Jr. (d3jsgurule@yahoo.com)
13 November 2004, 6:44 AM

http://halosn.bungie.org/fanfic/?story=john_gurule,.1113040644481.html
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(ENS) Rabid_Gallagher
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 17, 2004 4:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It was okay, but you needed to use the Code. I'll give it a 6 out of 10 for a good plot line
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MC's Cousin
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 19, 2004 1:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I didn't like it. Sorry, but I had to be honest. You need to develop that kind of thing more. Just, well, let me try:

An ancient mind
Buried in secrets against its will
Witness to horrors
Witness to the fall
The fall of many

A patient listener
Through rock and earth and time
Many words, and many sights
Until now

Now it is the others' turn to listen
Listen to the truth
Listen to the distant secrets
See the death that looms so near


It's crap and quickly written, but not just a quick over thing and whatever you wrote. Ask someone like Solidus; I'm not a poet.
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Nick Kang
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 19, 2004 1:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It was umm...strange. I particularyl didn't like how you kept on dragging out the words and making them twice as long for no particualry reason. Doing that made it flow rougher.

I did, however, like some of the rhymes in there, like the ones that used big words. And some of the verses flowed quite smoothly. But it's still pretty weird...
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SYSTEM
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 19, 2004 1:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ah... A poem. I don't really go for poems that much.

- Dave.
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MasterSushi
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 20, 2004 12:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
Ah... A poem. I don't really go for poems that much


Ummmmmm.... Neither do I....

(actually quite scared of that poem...)
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MasterSushi
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 20, 2004 12:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It was quite good though:)
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