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Soldiers & Saints (RD)

 
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hboff
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 12, 2007 5:51 pm    Post subject: Soldiers & Saints (RD) Reply with quote

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Soldiers & Saints (RD)
Posted by xX0 JACKAL 0Xx (jacaliber@gmail.com)
9 January 2007, 5:05 am

http://halosn.bungie.org/fanfic/?story=xX0_JACKAL_00109070505331.html
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Chuckles
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Joined: 29 Jul 2004
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Location: Grand Rapids MI

PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2007 11:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Once your author's note is taken away, this comes in at only 634 words, which is 116 words below the 750 word minimum spelled out in the guidelines for fan fiction submissions. Bottom line: this is too short. Take some time to familiarize yourself with the rules and then try again.

Good luck.

C.T. Clown
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Halo Fanatic 2006
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Joined: 17 Apr 2006
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Location: Azeroth, I can't find my way out!

PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2007 6:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

GPS problems, and some wierd words. ""Grenade!" Order Brute." Neutral What? Take time on your fiction. That and yes, It was too short. If you read the guidelines find out about the Code. You could use it. Good luck next time. Wink

-HF06
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houseoftang
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Location: In society, for a little while longer.

PostPosted: Sun Jan 14, 2007 2:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

BTW, a little explanation might be in order. GPS means Grammar, Punctuation, and Spelling. Mistakes. You had enough that I got a paragraph in and gave up. I guess I'm too anal about those things and seeing them too much frustrated me.

Your story, unfortunately, read like something poorly translated from Japanese--All your base are belong to us! That can be very discouraging to a reader who doesn't want to put out the effort to figure out what you're trying to say--that's the reason so many of us get annoyed with GPS mistakes--it means the story is much less enjoyable to read.

I'd suggest that you try writing on a word processor with both a spellcheck feature and a grammar checking feature (yes, I know that can be annoying). That would get you started. I'd also suggest you take a look at some other, published books (the Halo novels are probably not the best ones for this), to see how stuff is put together there--it has a fairly high likelihood of being correct. If you can handle it, try using some sort of English textbook or even one of those godawful style guides (Strunk's comes to mind, as does the Chicago Manual).

Finally, there are some really good sections in the Fan Fiction Forum here at HBO about writing fan fiction--it would benefit you a lot to use them. Your story will be a hundred times better for it.
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