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Don't Go

 
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hboff
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 02, 2004 9:20 pm    Post subject: Don't Go Reply with quote

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Don't Go
Posted by Solidus Snake (chikornx@aol.com)
30 October 2004, 9:36 PM

http://halosn.bungie.org/fanfic/?story=solidus_snak.1030042136051.html
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MC's Cousin
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Joined: 30 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 02, 2004 11:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Must you always write poems with such a downside. Geez, it's like Orsan Scott Card as Edgar Allen Poe.

But seriously. I thought it could have flowed together a bit more, been a tad more smooth.
It was obscure, too, I noticed. Whether on purpose or not, it kinda added to the flow aspect.

But, through that, it was decent. Actually, it was good. Or at least I think it was.
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(Na)Marl
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 03, 2004 11:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

--This is Gold Elite. My dad deleted my e-mail adress before I could activate my acount, so I use my Halo name now.
--Wow, that is gloomy. But nice. Again. Great work, fag, I feel depressed now Smile .I got to log now.


--Hehe, Poe
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(Na)Marl
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 04, 2004 5:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

--I ate a cookie, and now I feel better.
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Solidus Snake
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 05, 2004 2:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

(Na)Marl wrote:
... Great work, fag, I feel depressed now Smile ...

Yeah ok, don't know who the fuck Gold Elite is but don't call me fag. Swear to God I get enough of that shit.
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Chuckles
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 05, 2004 7:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

MC, Edgar Allen Poe was awesome, most of the time. Awesome and depressing.

Good poem, SS. Your were weaving a nice bit of pathos near the end when seemingly out of nowhere came "Ahhh F***!". That didn't seem to fit, and it broke the mood for me.

Other than that, good poetry. Hard to write this stuff and not sound corny, but you pull it off. Consistently.

C.T. Clown
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(Na)Marl
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 05, 2004 5:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

--Whoa! Sorry, man, I was just messin around with ya. I didn't actually mean it. Sad My bad. The poem was good.
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(Na)Marl
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 05, 2004 5:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

--And Gold Elite was the name I use to write under.
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Solidus Snake
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 05, 2004 11:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

To Chuckles: The whole ahh fuck was showing frustration and anger carrying out of the sad mood. I know its a big switch but it was just how I was feeling at the time. I tend to write my feelings out, and my mood tends to change.

But thanks and thanks to everyone else.

And yeah, writing poetry about Halo is pretty hard.
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MC's Cousin
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 06, 2004 2:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You know, I was actually being half serious and half sarcastic there. It did remind me of that type of duo, but, I never said that was a bad thing.
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(Na)Marl
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 07, 2004 10:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

--You accept my appology, right? I don't want to make an enemy. I don't like makin enemies.
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