HBO Fan Fiction

hboff · Site Admin Joined: 25 Jul 2004 Posts: 4351

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An Unkept Promise
Posted by Alpha Halo Writer (wsandlin@yahoo.com)
15 May 2006, 5:04 pm

http://halosn.bungie.org/fanfic/?story=Alpha_Halo_W0515061704231.html

Chuckles · Posted: Mon May 22, 2006 8:49 am Post subject:

Okay. This was nothing but a 246 word story that was structured as a poem to get past the 750 word minimum length requirement. No, poems don't have to rhyme, but you can't just break prose up into segments and call it poetry either.

AHW, this queue has not been good to you. Please, take some more time on your stuff before you submit it. As I have said on your other threads, you have talent. But right now you are covering it up with a bunch of sub-par submissions. Make your poems go further and say more. And if it really isn't a poem, make it longer and turn it into a story. If you haven't already, read some of the established authors on here and get a feel for what Halo fanfiction can be. Let me tell you: one solid submission is better than seven weak ones.

You. Can. Do. Better.

Good luck.

C.T. Clown

Matthiasthe14th · Posted: Mon May 22, 2006 9:03 am Post subject:

Hmmm... if I remember correctly, John 117 was cloned and never saw his parents again. In the mean time, the clone took John's place at home. Correct me if I'm wrong.

Chuckles · Posted: Mon May 22, 2006 9:06 am Post subject:

You are correct.

herosaber · Member Joined: 07 May 2006 Posts: 8

S-117 was cloned?
where did that info come from?
wasn't he taken away from his parents?
i think you might have gotten wrong information,OR, you asked someone who didn't know about halo.
maybe i'll find another halo expert..
ah yes, fanatic.

Matthiasthe14th · Posted: Mon May 22, 2006 6:45 pm Post subject: Re: cloned???