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An Unggoy Life: Chapter 30: Battle for Seattle

 
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hboff
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 17, 2005 2:02 pm    Post subject: An Unggoy Life: Chapter 30: Battle for Seattle Reply with quote

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An Unggoy Life: Chapter 30: Battle for Seattle
Posted by CrazyGrunt (thomas-hoskins@comcast.net)
16 October 2005, 6:24 pm

http://halosn.bungie.org/fanfic/?story=CrazyGrunt1016051824311.html
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Darth Evilness
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 18, 2005 11:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

excelent
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pieman
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 19, 2005 1:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I stopped reading about the second sentence.

Seattle is not the capital of Washington state.

If this was a good fic, then I'm sorry for not reading it. You MUST research your topics before writing about them. The capital is Olympia for future refrence.

Sorry for the harshness, if this is your 30th chapter, than wow. You've put a lot of effort and time into this. Keep it up, just remember your facts.
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Guardian
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 19, 2005 2:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

What pieman said and you need to spell out your numbers. If you just put 5 and 365. It looks bad, its decent over all. 343 GS is f-ing outta character.
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CrazyGrunt
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 19, 2005 6:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sorry about Guilty Spark being out of character. Oh, and pieman, I live in Washington state. I know that Olympia is the current capital, but we don't know what the capital of Washington state is five hundred years from now. Just trying to be imaginative here.

One more thing. Welcome Darth Eviliness
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