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The Machine inside

 
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hboff
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Joined: 25 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: Fri Oct 07, 2005 7:11 pm    Post subject: The Machine inside Reply with quote

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The Machine inside
Posted by AI Construct (Death_Of_A_God@hotmail.com)
7 October 2005, 1:55 am

http://halosn.bungie.org/fanfic/?story=AI_Construct1007050155591.html
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Tin Can Man
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Joined: 15 Jul 2005
Posts: 170

PostPosted: Fri Oct 07, 2005 8:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Where to start. Firstly capitalize your names. Also more detail. So what if he captain has an ego? Has he got blue eyes? What colour's his hair? And so on.
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