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Return from Retirement: A Short Story

 
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hboff
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 03, 2005 1:42 pm    Post subject: Return from Retirement: A Short Story Reply with quote

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Return from Retirement: A Short Story
Posted by Dagorath (hoyinshan@gmail.com)
2 October 2005, 11:34 am

http://halosn.bungie.org/fanfic/?story=Dagorath1002051134221.html
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mplacki
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 03, 2005 3:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Neato! The ending felt a bit rushed, but overall the story was interesting. Kinda wish you'd explained how the flood got on Earth, though... Confused
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SYSTEM
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 03, 2005 7:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

- Neat-o!

I like the idea of the Master Chief coming back: I like how he seems to feel comforted by the armour: it seems weird, but I know how he feels. Heh, I'd be pretty freaked out too, but I'd want a gun in my hand and harness on my back (Armour.)

I love the last sentence: The Master Chief was back.

So, where's Cortana?

And hey, it's good to see you again, Dag.

- Dave.
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"Lizzie Borden took an axe and gave her mother forty whacks. When she saw what she had done, she gave her father forty-one." - A child's nursery rhyme.

"When in doubt, empty your magazine." - Murphy's first law of combat operations.
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Wellington
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 6:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It was very well written but I had some problems with the material. I somehow can't see the chief relaxing on a beach. He was raised in a military institution and all he knows is duty. It's unlikely he would retire and soak some sun by his beachside cottage. That didn't sit with me.

Also, it doesn't exactly sit with the rest of the story. The Covenant are still around 10 years later one presumes. And another Halo was found. What about that.

As I said, good writing style.
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Caleb the Jackal
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 8:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very nice. Very nice. You are a good writer. I got a bit confused but this was still cool.

Caleb
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Dagorath
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 05, 2005 1:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, this is a short story. It's really a study of the Chief's fear of the Flood. I just didn't bother to explain how the Flood got on Earth, or where Cortana went, or whatever. This was really just a story about the Chief's "Return from Retirement".

He was a soldier all the time, but I guess even soldiers retire. Perhaps he got fired.

The ending of the Halo game trilogy I assumed for this story was that the Chief/the Arbiter (doesn't matter which) found the Ark, wherever it is, and busted the Halos. The Rebels (Elites, Grunts, Hunters) have prevailed over the Loyalists (Jackals, Drones, Brutes, Prophets). Everyone lives happily ever after, as the Covenant and the humans have reached a truce.
Although I didn't really care whether that was a plausible ending. After all, who says the Chief's gonna find the Ark? Or that the Rebels will beat the Loyalists? Or that the Arbiter and the Chief will become friends? Or that they will actually live happily ever after?

It doesn't really matter. This is a short story only; something fun. It's like my story "Arbiter's Fall": absolutely crazy (Arbiter vs Half-Jaw vs Tartarus's successor vs Prophet of Truth), but fun to write.

I fact, I wrote several more chapters of this story, but they turned out to be lots of parts with the Chief blasting Flood apart with his Shotgun, him driving his Gauss Hog (no idea why on earth he has one in his garage) and Cortana being chief AI in the UNSCDF.

Which is why I left this as a short story.


Last edited by Dagorath on Tue May 23, 2006 4:48 am; edited 1 time in total
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Commander Demitri Wolf
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2005 6:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hey that was good, I saw yuo reference Asimov, he wrote the Foundation and Empire books didn't he?
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Dagorath
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2005 11:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
I saw yuo reference Asimov, he wrote the Foundation and Empire books didn't he?


Yeah, he did. In fact, that reference came from one of his stand-alone novels Nemesis.
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AngryHorizon
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2005 2:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I can answer what happened to cortana.

She died, the average life span of an AI is seven years.
Hers would most likely be shorter becuase she took in so much information on the first halo.

Anyway you said it was ten years later, so she died.
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Tin Can Man
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2005 3:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Unless she got a big enough database. I think the thing with Smart AI's is that they don't 'die' but instead spend so much time thinking they can't do anything. If she were given room for expansion... This isn't really my forte, but thats what I think happens.
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Commander Demitri Wolf
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2005 10:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm sure there'd be like a 'Defragment' option on Cortana that she could kick back some shit, but then again, maybe there's a reason why Smart AI's have a life span, somthing in Bungie's great plan for the series.
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Dagorath
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PostPosted: Fri Oct 07, 2005 8:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Nylund kind of screwed up a little, cos Deja and Wellsley are just like Cortana: very capable. And yet they're just dumb AI. You would think that since Wellsley was a "military" AI, he wouldn't be able to say something like this:

Quote:
"You taught her well, Major, I'll give you that,"


He says that at the end of the Flood, when the LT blows the TaR up with a grenade, because it was her duty.

Then again, they never mentioned whether or not Cortana was a "smart" AI or not in the games, or whether there were "smart" AI at all. Remember: only the games (and the strat guide, and the game manuals) are canon, cos only they were written by Bungie.

Though of course, Cortana would never die. She's just too important to. It's like Sergeant Johnson dying: PoA blows up, he's fine; shoot him in AotCR, he's still fine. You can't keep a good man down. Or a good AI.
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