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The Log
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hboff
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2005 11:56 am    Post subject: The Log Reply with quote

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The Log
Posted by Odin of SoS. (kavika86@yahoo.com)
9 July 2005, 1:31 pm

http://halosn.bungie.org/fanfic/?story=Odin_of_SoS.0709051331181.html
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Mark Lieberg
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2005 1:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

geez...what happened to the saying "No one gets left behind?" them bastards.
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Nick Kang
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2005 1:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It sucks to be them, don't it?

I liked it, just like all of your other work. The combat was well planned, and the sadness of war was, for the most part, brought out. If there's a sequel, I'll be waiting for it eagerly.
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Helljumper
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2005 2:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

the arr from the pirates was funny. the first two paragraph started out ackwardly for me but the story picked up and came off great.

ODST
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Odin of SoS.
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2005 2:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

lol. i just had to toss that pirate thing in there. they're modeled after my team. same names and everything. everyone here calls me yogi. so i put that in there. but. thanks for reading.
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Guardian
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Joined: 26 Aug 2004
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2005 6:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Listen to Enemy Within - Arch Enemy as you read this story

Makes you hate the old Covenant so much more.
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Mainevent
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2005 6:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very good Odin. Way to make a comeback.

Stinking invisible Elites always sneaking up on people.

Grr.

Really got the emotions across and makes you feel for the team.

Good job.
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Odin of SoS.
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2005 7:44 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

why thank ya gents
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Bronzemage
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 13, 2005 1:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah that was good. You didn't stick with the normal stuff thta goes on in Halo, you improvised with your own stuff.

Well done.
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Syotica
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 13, 2005 12:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

One hell of a story dude.

Nice work.
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Odin of SoS.
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 14, 2005 3:21 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

heh. i remember back in the day there were all sorts of readers during the summer. i guess ppl just grow up.
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Recent Flood Victim
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 16, 2005 5:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Haha..I liked it. Keep up the good work.

Your neighborhood friend,
RFV
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MC's Cousin
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 18, 2005 7:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

And at last I made it here.

There was still that short, crispness to the writing. Some of it--to me--came across as telling. Other parts came across as fragments. Still, it was a good read, even though I thought some elements could have been improved.

Saw some smaller, minor errors. GPS stuff. Like a comma where it shouldn't have been.

Things went by a bit quickly during that ambush-like two senarios. I was thinking to myself that if they had been prolongued a bit it would have been more impacting. But I suppose that doing the scene through a radio has its limitations.

Pretty emotional.

One thing I didn't get: You mentioned orange explosions and plasma. I could see a human grenade (the fire) glowing orange, but not plasma. Never seen that before. Just a small detail I wasn't sure about.


Overall, this was very nice. I enjoyed it. A nice short story with some emotion to it. Keep up the work, Odin.
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Mainevent
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 18, 2005 7:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think that meant there were frag and plasma grenades going off.
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Odin of SoS.
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 18, 2005 9:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

exactly
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